Subject:        STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there,
is he still wrong?

A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops.
On my desk, I have a work station...

If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
I believe five out of four people have trouble with fractions.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with,
"Quit while you're ahead"?

Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?

What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?

I was thinking that women should put pictures of missing husbands
on beer cans.

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?  What
are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?  Why don't they just put
their pictures on the postage stamps so the mailmen could look for them while they
delivered the mail?

Never agree to plastic surgery if the doctor's office is full of
portraits by Picasso.

VENI, VEDI, VISA: I came, I saw, I did a little shopping.

If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are
the OTHERS here for?

STRESSED spelled backwards is DESSERTS.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Clones are people two.

Go ahead and take risks....just be sure that everything will turn
out OK.

Noone ever says "It's only a game," when their team is winning.

As I said before, I never repeat myself!

If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

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